What nature teaches us about silence

 

 

Nature gave us one tongue and two ears so we could hear twice as much as we speak.

- Epictetus, philosopher

Too often we speak before we think and do not listen nearly as much as would benefit us. Today, examine situations where you might learn something by listening instead of talking. Some people can be challenging to relate to–a nosy mother-in-law, overbearing boss or co-worker, or simply your child wanting your attention. Instead of justifying your feelings or explaining your point of view, use effective yet concise words and then wait for a reply. Good leaders are always marked by being good listeners. When a friend needs to talk, resist the urge to give advice right away and just listen. We have an obligation to tame our tongues and give people the courtesy of being an attentive and engaged listener. Wouldn’t you want the same respect? Everyone deserves to be heard. Give that thoughtfulness to someone this week.

Being a positive force in someone’s life

Kindness is difficult to give away because it keeps coming back.

- Church billboard in Louisiana

Perhaps you’ve seen how an upward spiral can happen as you build a healthy lifestyle. With momentum and small, but consistent, healthy actions, success comes easier and easier until results start to exceed the effort you put into it. Well, the same thing can happen when it comes to being a positive force for others. One small action leads to another, which can lead to many. Your actions may inspire others to do the same, with far-reaching results that completely outweigh that first effort. You’ll probably have no idea how much of a total effect your actions will have. But that kindness will often be paid back two-, three- or even tenfold. If not from the person you helped, then from someone further down the “kindness” chain. So go try it out! Do a kind thing for the next person you meet, and see if you don’t get a positive return.

Are you creating your own life?

The people who get on in this world are the people who get up and look for the circumstances they want, and, if they can’t find them, make them.

- George Bernard Shaw, playwright

Take a moment to look at the circumstances of your world. Is it what you want to see? What could you do differently to take one step closer to your ideal vision? We’re all dealt different hands in life. That’s how things are. To change things, you have to first accept that fact, then figure out where to go from here. We should all be able to count on each other for help, but in the end, we can’t expect anyone to change our lives except ourselves. Nor should we want it that way. It’s natural to feel powerless and give up in the face of hardships, but complaining and blaming do nothing except prevent action. Without positive action, you’re giving up your power and asking for more of the same–a world you did not create. Where you start may not be your fault, but the course you run is still your choosing.

Believing in yourself no matter what

The mighty oak was once a little nut that stood its ground.

- Unknown

On July 24, 2004, there was a 0% chance of rain in Cincinnati. No way was it going to rain, according to the people who should know best. You know what? Despite millions of dollars worth of sensors, computers, and forecasting systems, the weather experts were wrong. It rained, against all odds. This is not a criticism of weather people. It’s just a reminder of all the people who were given 0% chance of making it by the “experts,” but who succeeded anyway. Whenever accomplishments are on the line, there are always voices whispering, preaching–even shouting–that it can’t be done. Sometimes, that voice is coming from inside our own heads. If you’re having doubts about your abilities, just remember: How many times have the naysayers been proven wrong? No matter what anyone says–no matter what you might believe–it can be done. The nut can become a tree. There’s always a chance of rain.

Overcoming obstacles one at a time

“Fall seven times. Stand up eight.”

- Japanese Proverb

Your goals may not come easy. There is no accomplishment without work, and no “win” without something to beat. It’s easy to get discouraged when roadblocks appear–in fact, it’s only natural. You’ve invested time and emotion into creating the perfect plan, and then something has to come along and muck it all up. Sometimes, though, all you have to do to beat that barrier is to get back up and move forward again. Obstacles are like the Wizard behind the curtain–they’re a lot less intimidating once you see them up close. Next time you take a step back, don’t let guilt pile it on top of your previous “stumbles.” Just take two steps forward and you’re still farther along than you were before. It doesn’t matter how many walls you face. You only have to get the better of that last one.

Finding and celebrating the joy in life

“We should consider every day lost in which we have not danced at least once.”

- Nietzsche, philosopher

Each day is a new chance to find joy and to dance. If you let it pass or think it useless, the chance is gone and you’ll never get it back. When was the last time you played? Or just did something for the sheer fun of it? Joy is not found in the world around you, it’s within yourself. You can make your own joy, especially during those dark times when you need to really feel alive again. Fun and play are healthy antidotes to taking life–and ourselves–too seriously. They’re proven boosters of immune systems and mental health and make life worth the trouble. So do the twist. Sing in the shower. Learn a magic trick. Watch a cartoon. Challenge some kids to a game. Don’t let a single day go to waste.

Surrounding Yourself with the Right People

“Keep away from people who try to belittle your ambitions. Small people always do that, but the really great ones make you feel that you, too, can become great.”

- Mark Twain, writer and satirist

It’s easy to recognize a perfect candidate for your support team. Just look for someone who has a way of making everyone else around them better: someone who succeeds by developing other people and letting them in on the fun; someone who is genuinely happy when other people succeed. That’s the person you want on your side. The pages of history are heavy with tales of the misguided who were proven wrong while insisting something couldn’t be done. Why put up with that? Believe in your goals enough to know that you shouldn’t stomach people who don’t. It’s okay if you’re the only one who believes in your dream. But someone who truly believes in YOU should help you believe that if anyone can do it, you can.